I was swaying when I let you in my life. Those early days of our friendship, someone very close to me left me faking death. At that time, I had almost lost hope, I had stopped believing that you can have someone you can share your feelings with. I was thinking that what's the use of getting closer to someone when they are going to leave you in the end anyway? After an incident, just after 1 and half week of our chatting, I tried to leave you, but you didn't let me. You said you have lost too many good people in your life and you don't want to lose anyone else. Those words stopped me and I reserved a very special place for you in my heart. It may be sounding too much philosophical but it's true. I made you a part of my life and I started considering you a part of my family. You called me your brother on too many occasions; even just 2 days before you left me, you called me your little brother. Have you any idea how good I felt at that time, at that moment? And then you did the same thing. You left me hanging there, without even a tiny bit of consideration that how I will do without you. You could have given me a week at least. I could have said those unsaid words, those untold stories that I haven't shared with you yet. Its like you gave me wings, and then told me its illegal to fly.
these days are hard.
Sometimes I'm sitting with my family, or sitting alone, and it just hits me out of nowhere, the realization of how much I miss your presence in my life, how much I miss our talks, your teasing, everything. But that follows with what happened, how you preferred a person you started talking few months ago over me, me whom you called your brother and you had known for few years now. I was the person who gave preference to you over everyone, because I called you my family. You once told me not to expect too much from you but at least you could have known your priorities. Or maybe you had always known, it was just me who didn't know them. Stupid me.